The Plan

We met with the RE last night. I was jittery all day. I have this almost inherent distrust of doctors. I don't know where this comes from, but I always feel that I'm not going to be taken seriously. I knew he wasn't going to say "It's only been 16 months - let's wait another year!" but I was still apprehensive.

The doctor was a little younger than I thought he'd be after seeing his picture online. He was extremely polite and explained every term in a way that was informative but not condescending. He was also very honest, telling us that my husband's test results border on severe but aren't quite there. He wants him to repeat the test at least once more, probably twice. We were told that if they continue to come back like this one, there's not a lot that can be done to increase the count since we've ruled out varicoceles and other blood-flow issues.

Our current plan is to try an IUI this cycle. This will apparently give us a 20% chance, about what we would get if we had no issues. I like that he said we could try it for 2 or 3 months depending on how fast we want to proceed. Plus, IUI is covered by our insurance! It would be wonderful to skip the whole money draining black hole of IVF. Speaking of IVF, he said that we are excellent candidates for it if it comes down to that because of our age and health. It also helps that my tests (so far) have all come back normal.

I get to have repeat CD3 bloodwork on Monday. I'm scheduled for an ultrasound a week from Monday and at that point we'll talk about setting up the date for the IUI. They sometimes do them two consecutive days, so we'll see if they think that's best for us.

Right now, I'm battling two conflicting emotions, something that I've become an expert at since entering this struggle with infertility. On one hand, I feel elated that we're moving forward and doing something. I despise the whole "wait a year and call us" attitude we take towards people dealing with IF. I love the idea that we're going to have the same odds as a "regular" couple for this next cycle. On the other hand, I'm impatient. I don't like the idea of waiting another 2-3 months to try and get pregnant. I understand that it's the best way to go, but I've had my fill of waiting.

I'm going to focus on making this a positive experience. I plan on getting back to the gym, trying meditation, and eating healthy food. I'm not sure how much of a connection exists between mind and body, but I'm going to do everything I can to make this upbeat. Fingers crossed!